Thursday, December 4, 2014

Found My Home

Running, getting lost on trails, looking for a rock that doubles as a slide can really get your brain thinking.

For the longest time, I've fought against making Arizona my home, consistently having one foot out of the door, just praying for an opening to get out. Originally, I thought my children were the only reasons I stay here because living 2 hours away from them is already brutal as it is. My heart traveling the country, looking for my home, roaming and never really feeling settled. But I was wrong...

There are many reasons why I stay here, why Arizona is a wonderful place. I have made connections with some of the most wonderful people that remind me of what growing up in the Bay Area hardcore scene was like. I feel apart of a family here, something I desire and need. Thinking about leaving the friends I've made here just bogs me down. You are all huge pieces in my life's puzzle and constant motivators. And if that weren't cause for calling Arizona my home, the trails have become my church. I feel spiritually sound, filtering through all my thoughts, journaling without picking up a pen. My mind is at ease and I know it doesn't seem like much to a lot of you reading this, but I feel at peace and like I can go forever when I'm out on the trails here. The distance isn't what keeps me going to the trails, it's the connection to myself, to god that keeps me going back.

All in all, life here in Arizona is wonderful. It wasn't where intended or ever thought about making my home, but I've found peace in where I'm at and during a run the other night, I've realized that this is my home, this is where I'm supposed to be. But you never know what the future will bring, I'm just living in the now.

I'm happy to call Arizona my home.